Can't stand losing you
A lot of Stings songs come off as some type of romantic serenade to women. 'Can't stand losing you' is on the opposite end of that spectrum. Its mix of bitterness, angst and anger almost makes you feel bad for the guy. Yeah, maybe not so much on that.
I've called you so many times today
And I guess it's all true what your girlfriends say
That you don't ever want to see me again
And your brother's gonna kill me and he's six feet ten
I guess you'd call it cowardice
But I'm not prepared to go on like this
Come on Sting, leave the woman alone. She clearly thinks you are some kind of freak, like myself, and doesn't want to look at your pigeon face anymore.
The song goes on to repeat the poor man's mantra "I can't, I can't, I can't stand losing you" over and over and over. It's like being beaten with a bat, over and over and over.
That's why the last verse makes me feel for any girl's safety around him:
I guess this is our last goodbye
And you don't care so I won't cry
But you'll be sorry when I'm dead
And all this guilt will be on your head
I guess you'd call it suicide
But I'm too full to swallow my pride
I can't stand losing you
Murder suicide? Yeah no good.
Creep Level= 6
Don't stand so close to me
Well well well what do we have here? Hmmm?
I think an alternate title for this song could have easily been "Lolita".
Don't stand so close to me takes a seriously catchy melody and brings it to levels of pure disbelief.
Young teacher, the subject
Of schoolgirl fantasy
She wants him so badly
Knows what she wants to be
Inside her there's longing
This girl's an open page
Book marking - she's so close now
This girl is half his age
Okay I get it, a lot of 70's and 80's songs have lyrics singing about young love, where the girl's age is questionable at best. Sting though, just blows this whole thing out of the water and goes for the throat.
Her friends are so jealous
You know how bad girls get
Sometimes it's not so easy
To be the teacher's pet
Oh I BET you know how bad girls get, you creep.
Then... somehow... it gets worse
So bad it makes him cry
Wet bus stop, she's waiting
His car is warm and dry
Creep Level= 10
Every breath you take
Jesus where do you even begin with this? When I was a kid and never really paid attention to the lyrics and just listened to the words coming out of this man's mouth, I actually really liked this song. I mean come on what's not to like? He clearly loves this lady... right?
Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take
I'll be watching you
Wait what!? Is he saying what I think he's saying?
Yes, the song I grew up listening to as a sweet and lovely ode to his significant other is nothing more than a warning. He's pretty much telling this girl "You'd better watch your back"
Oh, can't you see
You belong to me
Girl you'd better put 911 on your speed dial.
Since you've gone I've been lost without a trace
I dream at night I can only see your face
I look around but it's you I can't replace
I feel so cold and I long for your embrace
I keep crying baby, baby please
This song is legit the stalker's anthem. At the annual Stalker's Convention, this song comes on the loudspeaker and Sting walks into the room.
Stalker level = If you haven't called the police you're already dead.
Shawn McGovern grew up on a farm 15 miles from Toledo OH. His life long dream is to one day visit that magical city and tell all of his friends about it.